Throughout 2025, we are spending the first full weekend of each month with posts inspired by Gretchen Rubin in her New York Times bestseller book, The Happiness Project. Rubin’s yearlong exploration involved dedicating each month to a specific theme or aspect of happiness. Specifically, she incorporated practical strategies and actionable insights to cultivate a more fulfilling and joyful life. Many of the techniques described in the book can also be applied to tennis. The two themes for April are “Lighten Up” and “Parenthood.”
Tennis parenting is a topic I will forever shy away from. The time spent at Junior tournaments with my daughter did not yield any great wisdom to pass on to others, but it wasn’t so horrible for a self-deprecating “don’t make these mistakes I made” angle. The experience yielded some great moments and some that were… not. On more occasions than I care to admit, the end of a Junior tournament run was comiserated by passing a pint of Ben and Jerry’s between us on the sofa of a hotel room that was optimistically retained an extra night in anticipation of a better result. Tennis parenting is an experience, Rubin calls “fog happiness.” The individual data points did not produce a lot of joy, but in aggregate, it was mostly good and rewarding. At least I like to think so.
During my second tournament after returning to tennis as an adult, my opponent held up the ball and said, “Have fun” before delivering her first serve to start the match. It startled me. At no point in my own Junior experience can I recall anyone ever saying that before a match began. A decade after that transpired, I have come to believe that she taught me a valuable lesson in how to “lighten up.” It is good to remind ourselves and others that tennis is supposed to be fun.
Life is better when we can find ways to inject a little joy into mundane moments. Simple tweaks in attitude or routine can create microdoses of happiness. It can be something as small as a humorous string dampener, silly mantras that make you smile, or an inside joke with your doubles partner. Tiny shifts don’t require major effort, but they can completely change your energy and help you reconnect with the joy that probably got you into tennis in the first place.
We should all strive to lighten up and rediscover the simple joy of playing the sport. Tennis can be serious, intense, and even frustrating, but it can also be playful, social, and deeply satisfying when we allow it to be. The better we can shift our mindset and stay open to those lighter moments, the more likely we are to keep coming back to the court with a smile.
So this April, try approaching your matches, practices, and training with a little less pressure and a little more curiosity. Say “Have fun” before the first serve. Find joy in the rhythm of a good rally or the absurdity of playing on a windy day. Let tennis be a reminder that joy doesn’t have to be tied to winning. Happiness shows up when we’re fully present, having fun, and not taking ourselves or the sport too seriously. Lighten up.
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Throughout 2025, I am dedicating the first full weekend of every month to exploring how ideas from Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project (<- Sponsored Link) can spark greater enjoyment and happiness in tennis. This is a non-tennis book that I have come to believe everyone should read. Seriously, you should get your hands on a copy of this book and consider trying some of the techniques described by the author.
